The Passion of the Muppet: Our Lord and Saviour Elmo

Animal, the unhinged drummer from Electric Mayhem, has been missing for several weeks – see here for the initial investigation. After the ill-fated dinner party at Wong’s Palace, the ominous signs of beer turning into blood and fortunes foretelling betrayals within the group led to the blackout and the taking of Animal.

After being missing for several weeks, his bandmates, friends and devoted followers were looking for him high and low. Many posters of their lost companion were plastered in the most inconceivable places you can think: over walls, in bathroom stalls, in seedy bathroom stalls, at the regular clubs they’re thrown out of…

Sadly, his disappearance remained static for a long time, much to the heavy hearts of his friends and fans alike. If we're honest, it’s not surprising, as everyone was too hammered to do anything to find the caveman. They figured he was probably lying around in some gnarly ditch, covered in lacerations.

The notorious Kermit the Frog was found hanging inside a closet in a sleazy motel as he couldn’t live with the guilt of prosecuting the wild-haired messiah.

Animal was strung up on a silver hanger, like a scarecrow, in a shabby Salvation Army. He was completely flushed of his stuffing, his bulbous eyes popping out with ping pong balls.

It was learned that the assailants who had taken Animal were a cult-like group of frogs clad in black hoods. They spent several weeks torturing him, which involved making him go through an atrocious drug withdrawal, depriving him of his rags and shaving his head. Animal was broken down to his former childish self with the high-pitched voice, Elmo.

The frogs clad in black threw his limp body in front of a Salvation Army. The workers, who had mistaken his body as a costume, had him tagged as 50 per cent off because he was a little worn to wear (even to the store standards.)

But there is hope – his band was able to scrape up enough money to re-purchase him and have him rehabilitated.

Chris Joyal

A nineteen year old unhealthily obsessed with Hannibal memes and anything darkly humorous. Or any stupid pun that my little brain capacity can comprehend. Often called a cave-dweller or ghost by known relatives, and probably a few classmates as well, because of my rare sightings and frequent disappearances, like Big Foot, or the Loch Ness Monster.

It’s A Meme!

where i got this from https://me.me/i/jerrytrainor-jerrytrainor-1-im-ok-with-it-quackity-quackit-20h-gonna-6c9e4b348918424190bd4cfa21cd8b2b

Meme Magazine is proud to officially introduce, for the first time, Gonna Tell My Kids That This Was! (also known as Gonna Tell My Kids.) This meme was born on Twitter, Sept. 19, 2019.

What started as a saucy joke at the expense of Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has become a mass meme sensation! The meme may have started in September, but it truly made a name for itself in November by jumping to everyone’s feeds. It’s not a day-to-day front page meme anymore, as it was in the first week of November, but it’s hard to scroll through Twitter without seeing at least one post featuring the new meme.

We want to apologize for the delay in welcoming this good meme to the world – but we are so happy to be able to welcome you now.

Now that Gonna Tell My Kids is doing so well, we hope that it will continue to grow and progress in a healthy meme way and not lose themselves to the high and mighty meme life. We hope we can see this meme join our favourites in the hearts of memers everywhere, like Grumpy Cat, Sad Keanu, Kermit, Dat Boi and Peppa Pig.

Ladies, gentlemen and non-binary friends, we could be witnessing a momentous moment in meme history!

Check this meme out for yourself on Twitter or join the fun and make a post yourself.

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Julia Rivoire

Julia enjoys mobile and PC games in her free time. She has a dog, Shadow, who means the world to her but they live in different towns while Julia attends school. Nothing memes – oh sorry I mean nothing means – more to her than memes.

If this magazine doesn’t take off I don’t know what I’ll do. I can’t go back to memeing alone. I can’t.

Nicole TV Joins "Dancing with the Memes" Competition!

Via https://www.youtube.com/

Nicole TV is the newest member to join the “Dancing with the Memes” competition.

Kayla Nicole Jones, better known as Nicole TV, is a Youtube comedian with 2.9 million subscribers. Her videos include comedy sketches, beauty guru videos and vlogs. Some of her videos have reached over 11 million views. She also has become the face of many memes during the summer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQoKX5kAonw

After her impressive dance move, “The Snake,” the producers of the show decided to add Nicole to the upcoming lineup. We had the chance to speak with Nicole before she starts rehearsals.

Meme Magazine: How are you feeling, Nicole? Are you excited, nervous?

Nicole TV: I am really excited! I’m so honoured that the producers picked me!  

MM: Who do you think your partner will be?

NT: I am not entirely sure yet. I am hoping that I will be able to dance with Kermit the Frog.

MM: Why do you think Dancing with the Memes picked you to be one of their contestants?

NT: I think it’s because - umm, because of my Snake Dance tutorial. You know, that video blew up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5bf3a1icbw

MM: What outfits are you thinking of wearing?

NT: I’m really hoping they’ll let me do my snake move and I’ll get to wear my snake dress. (Seen in picture above.)

MM: Do you think your friend Deshae will be here to support you?

NT: Can we move to the next question?

MM: Yes, of course. What do you think of all the participants that will be competing against you?  

NT: Umm, I think they’ll be good. But good luck against my snake dance.

MM: Nicole, why don’t you give us a glimpse of what you can do as a dancer?

NT: Sure!

via https://www.youtube.com/

MM: Nicole, are you okay?!

NT: Yeah, yeah. Sorry about making the chair fall. I’m going to change, I’ll be back.

NT: Y’all ready?

Via https://www.youtube.com/

Nicole Showing us her famous dance move.

https://www.youtube.com/

Nicole trying to do a handstand.

via https://www.youtube.com/

Nicole Having difficult with her SWEATSHIRT

NT: WHY DO IT KEEP DOING THAT?!  

Some of the other guests that will be appearing on the show are:

-          Dancing Detective Pikachu.

-          Hotline Bling Drake.

-          Patrick Star, with his thigh-high boots.

The rest of the lineup is still in the works. However, some fan favourites are coming back once again:

-          Dancing Kermit the Frog is returning for his third year.

-          Dancing Winnie the Pooh is returning once again for his eighth year.

-          Dancing Pumpkin Man is coming back for his seventh year.

Catch the rest of Nicole TV’s journey on Dancing with the Memes on MEM Network. The competition begins on January 7, 2019 at 9 p.m. Eastern and 8 p.m. Central!

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Sarah Hope

Sarah Hope has a doctorate in meme research. She also enjoys reading, writing, photography and appreciates a good pun.

What Does Impact Font’s Lawsuit Mean For the Meme Industry?

Like it or not, Impact font has been an industry staple since the beginning. via i can has

The meme industry has had a long and storied history over the years. From the early hits of Dancing Baby and ROFLcopter, to the modern greats of Harambe and Is this a Pigeon?, it’s safe to say that memes aren’t going anywhere anytime soon.

However, this growth may come crashing to a halt. On October 4th, 2019, Impact Font, an associate of many best-known memes, announced that it was suing the top memes in the industry. Officially known as Impact Font v Memes this case is set to change the meme landscape if Impact Font wins.

Many might not know Impact Font by name, but its position as one of the most important factors in developing the early meme industry is difficult to debate. Impact was the font of choice for meme superstars such as Bad Luck Brian and Awkward Penguin. Meme styles sporting top and bottom text superimposed upon an image most likely use Impact. As such, Impact has long been a silent play-maker in the growing meme world. Impact was the font of choice for these celebrities, and now it seems Impact is tired of watching quietly.

According to official reports, Impact has sued a conglomeration of the highest-grossing memes that partnered with it. Impact’s lawyers claim that the failure to credit the font resulted it in not getting the same level of fame that the memes it partnered with, despite contributing majorly to them. A second issue brought up by Impact’s lawyers is that the memes have no made efforts to stop unlicensed meme generators from using Impact’s intellectual property. Lawyers for both parties have declined any comment, but rumor has it that the defendants may cite the landmark Comic Sans v School Assignments case as grounds for dismissal of the suit. 

If impact font wins, meme generators may face further regulations. via Know Your meme

As of reporting, the battle is still ongoing, but if Impact wins, the meme industry may face similar lawsuits in the future. Impact isn’t the only font that’s found popularity, as many smaller fonts have found jobs serving as “meme labels.” In rough legal terms, a “meme label” is any font that is placed on an image, not on the top and bottom. Impact’s victory could set a precedent for these smaller fonts to sue as well.

The meme industry could also see the stricter regulation of meme generators, resulting in a slowed production of memes in the future. While the industry has relied on a self-regulating and internal quality control system, we may see independent regulatory bodies be formed to ensure fair use of fonts. The rapid-fire, dime-a-dozen style of meme creation we’re currently used to would slow down to ensure that use of memes and their fonts are within their legal rights.

Whatever the verdict is, we here at Meme Magazine are sure that it will have a massive impact on the future of the industry.

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Jonathan Jeffrey

Jonathan Jeffrey is the Managing Editor of Meme Magazine. Jonathan has received several awards in the fields of meme journalism, and international fame for breaking the Scumbag Steve scandal. He has a masters degree in Advanced Meme Physchology, as well as a minor in Meme Journalism at KYM University.

Snark and Wit: Which Memes are the Masters?

Memes are made with a variety of purposes. Some are meant to be cute; others, stupid. Many greats are a combination of the two. But the funniest and most impactful memes are those that exude sarcasm. Nothing makes an internet user hit that share button faster than an eye-catching image with text that packs a punch. There’s something admirable about how they make their points clear and without apology.

Come with us as we celebrate the snarkiest of memes: the ones that sting and provoke, the ones that start arguments and make family gatherings uncomfortable. You know, the FUN memes! Here are our top three most witty and sarcastic memes the Internet has produced.

3. Is This A Pigeon?

Actually, it’s a NEET.

What started as a simple screenshot making fun of an anime character’s mix-up became 2018’s go-to meme for taking shots at one another. “Is This A Pigeon?” depicts the target as the confused anime man mixing up one concept for another. Political parties, social justice warriors and countless others have been the butt of the joke for years. Self-deprecation isn’t uncommon either, but as a take-that meme, this one stands as one of the most underhanded out there — and it’s still going strong today.

2. Woman Yelling At A Cat

Who knew two 7-year-apart images could come together so well?

You’ve probably seen this one recently as it’s currently EVERYWHERE. The two images: a yelling woman, taken from a 2011 episode of Malibu Beach Party From Hell, and an annoyed looking cat from a 2018 Tumblr post, are pasted together to create hilarious scenarios. Those have evolved from funny reactions to a mess of sarcastic take-thats.

The yelling woman was originally captioned with various situations while the cat represented someone’s annoyed reaction – for example, a mother telling her kid to clean their room while they play video games and look irritated. Nowadays, the meme tends to depict a blunt response to a complaint or argument, usually aimed at easily offended individuals. Who needs debating skills when you have edited images!

1. Condescending Wonka

With a shot of OUCH.

It’s strange to think that perhaps the most hard-hitting meme of them all came from a beloved children’s film. In a scene from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Mr. Wonka rests his head on his hand and grins at his visitors; it was a charming moment in the film. But when the image was posted online in 2011, the internet loved the character’s smug look so much that the endless captions that followed seemed only natural.

While Wonka is a meme that spares no one, some targets include people with high education, conceited individuals and even those who use the meme. Anyone can be patronized, and let’s face it – every sly remark reads 100 times better with Wonka’s grin above it.

There you have it: our top three most snarky memes. Though there are many more, these are the ones that stand the strongest today. Whether you approve of their blunt attitude or not, they’re a part of internet culture and they never fail to provide an amusing spectacle. Let us enjoy these bold memes and all the savage snark that’s to come!

https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/1370553-is-this-a-pigeon

https://www.southernmarylandchronicle.com/2019/11/10/woman-yelling-at-cat-meme-takes-over-the-internet/

https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/233248-condescending-wonka-creepy-wonka

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Brandi-Anne Hibbs

Brandi-Anne Hibbs has been quietly stalking and observing memes for over a decade, but still doesn’t quite understand their nature. Nevertheless, she’s dedicated to making sense of them through writing!

Memes That Define the 2010s

The 2000s are coming to an end. We at Meme Magazine are taking the time to look back at the greatest memes that have defined the 2010s. We also take this time to inform you where your favorite memes are today.

Via https://giphy.com/

Brittany Tomlinson, a.k.a Kombucha Girl made us question whether we should actually drink Kombucha. She now has a new partnership with “Damn it’s Kombucha” brand. She plans on releasing commercials and a campaign in 2020.

via https://guestofaguest.com/

Ryan McKenna, better known as Selfie Kid, did not even realize who Justin Timberlake was during the Super Bowl Halftime Show. Little did he know, that selfie would change his life. He is now part of Timberlake’s PR team and travels the world with him. His job is making sure that Justin Timberlake’s fans get that perfect selfie.

via https://knowyourmeme.com/

Yelling Meryl Streep is taking a break from the big screen. Even with a fantastic acting career under her belt, she has decided to join a yodelling group in Switzerland. It has been a dream of hers since she was a young child.  They will be touring around Europe alongside Mason Ramsey. 

via https://knowyourmeme.com/

Confused Math Lady made us realize that we are not alone when it comes to not understanding math. She now teaches “Understanding the Math Behind Memes” at Harvard University and still makes a confused face when she does not understand a math problem.

Via http://www.mtv.com/

After his one night performance at the 2015 Super Bowl, Left Shark decided to quit the entertainment business. He wanted to help sharks that are being affected by climate change. Left Shark is one of the main organizers and participates in the climate strikes that take place in California.

via https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/

Pharrell himself is still involved with the music industry. After being in the spotlight at the 2014 Grammy Awards Grammy, his hat decided to join the RCMP. Pharrell’s hat made this decision because he could not handle the spotlight. His hat now lives in Jasper, Alberta and keeps in touch with Pharrell. They speak on the phone regularly and visit each other every now and then.

via https://giphy.com/

Side eye Chloe is currently in the 7th grade. She once gave side-eye to a teacher who assigned her too much homework. Her teacher told her to stop giving side-eye. She decided to create the eye-rolling club at her school. Side-eye Chloe is the president and the club has been going strong for two years now.

via https://www.npr.org/

Crying Michael Jordan has always wanted a good Kleenex brand to wipe away his tears. Michael Jordan now works with the Kleenex brand to make sure their tissues are resistant to tears when you want to have a good cry.

via https://tenor.com/

Rebecca Black wrote a sensational album called “Saturday.” It became a chart topping album and went on a world stadium tour. She won multiple Grammy awards and there is speculation that she will release new music. She plans on writing about how much she hates Sundays.

via https://giphy.com/

Old Spice Horse Guy never intended to fall in love with horses, but it was love at first neigh. He never wanted to be a model in the first place. Old Spice Horse Guy’s dream has always been to work with horses. After the commercial, he decided to change careers. Now, he owns a horse farm and gives horseback riding lessons to children on a beach.

The last few years have treated us well with memes! The world awaits the future of memes eagerly. What spectacular memes will be unleashed on the world in the coming years? Just because the 2010s are coming to an end does not mean we should forget some of our favourite memes from the past years!

To the future of memes!

https://knowyourmeme.com/

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Sarah Hope

Sarah Hope has a doctorate in meme research. She also enjoys reading, writing, photography and appreciates a good pun.

The Muppet's Last Supper

Sesame Street has been postponed for several weeks due to the recent disappearance of the show’s main star performer, Animal.

This red-haired primitive drummer was last seen at a Chinese restaurant called Wong’s Palace with nine of his Muppet co-stars. Including his Electric Mayhem bandmates, the gravelly-voiced keyboardist and leader, Dr. Teeth, and laid-back bass player Floyd Pepper.

The cast members wanted to celebrate another year of success being on-air, mostly in Animal’s honour, for his rising notoriety on the Muppets for his wild antics on and off stage. Because of Animal’s actions, Electric Mayhem’s havoc reached a crowd of cult-like followers, who became devoted to indulging in anarchy with their own.

Kermit the Frog, once the face of The Muppets, has seen his popularity decline substantially. Due to the show’s primary focus on Animal and his bandmates painting the city red, the wholesome frog act isn’t cutting it with viewers anymore. But he seems to be on amicable terms with musicians as he, too, attended Animal’s party.

Since Wong’s Palace was already packed enough for this large group, restaurant owner Mr. Wong made an exception. He had his staff put together two long dining tables horizontally, due to limited space, facing the front of Wong’s Palace.

The thirteen stars, including Animal, were enjoying their warm Tsingtao (Chinese Beer) and cracking their fortune cookies together.

Strange events began to happen within the restaurant’s setting. Their beer began to turn into blood, as some of them gulped it down without noticing the strange taste. When it came to their fortune cookies, unsuspecting partygoers started taking bites out of their fortune cookies and found themselves spitting out tufts of red fur with embedded skin.

All the fortune cookies they cracked open had the exact same ominous sentence: “One of you shall betray me,” written in Animal’s almost illegible handwriting.

The partygoers broke into fits of panic and threw themselves at the stringy caveman’s feet, demanding to know whether they would be the Judas of the group.

Animal merely replied, “Nuh uh.”

But Kermit the Frog, who was getting a little too hammered on the red beer, got more than he’d bargained for. When it came Kermit’s turn to say “Is it me, Animal?”, the Muppet turned to him, all teeth, and growled right back, “IS IT ME, ANIMAL!?” in his guttural voice.

The sloshed frog made his way towards Animal, stepping over other Muppets’ toes. Collectively, the affected Muppets yowled and turned to each other, each expressing their frustration at this fucking frog with raised arms. Kermit, oblivious, gave Elmo a big smooch on his cheek before accidentally knocking hot tea all over his crotch and making him roar aloud in agony.

Mr. Wong thought it would be a good time to photograph them, once again commemorating their last supper.

And then the lights turned off.

This left everyone screeching from fear as they were grabbed and shoved to the ground by some unknown entity. When the lights turned back on, their jumbled bodies all lay on the ground, almost knocked unconscious.

Everyone was there, except Animal.

To be continued….

https://thechive.com/category/humanity/art/

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Chris Joyal

A nineteen year old unhealthily obsessed with Hannibal memes and anything darkly humorous. Or any stupid pun that my little brain capacity can comprehend. Often called a cave-dweller or ghost by known relatives, and probably a few classmates as well, because of my rare sightings and frequent disappearances, like Big Foot, or the Loch Ness Monster.

Aliens

This is the story of Ancient Aliens cameraman Evan Evans.

Ancient Aliens was a hit show when it started in 2010, continuing through to its 14th season in 2019. Giorgio A. Tsoukalos appeared in the series, becoming a meme with his famous quote and crazy hair.

“Aliens”

- Giorgio A. Tsoukalos

After a full day of filming, Evan Evans wanted to go home. Evans was leaving the building when he saw a strange circle of light in the sky.

He blinked and it disappeared. He wasn't sure what it was, and thought maybe he was seeing things. The last thing he was thinking about was aliens. He got to his car and dropped his keys when he pulled them from his jacket pocket, kicking them under the vehicle as he moved to pick them up.

Evans got down on his hands and knees to reach them and saw not only his keys but a strange pair of webbed feet on the other side of his car. In a panic, he jumped up to see the owner of those feet… but found no one there. He was alone in the parking lot.

Or so he thought. He figured it was all the talk of aliens that was getting to him.

Quickly grabbing his keys, he unlocked and got into his car after taking a few minutes to gather his thoughts. He backed up his car and drove out of the parking lot to his hotel.

On the road home, things became even more bizarre. The one-lane highway began to blur as if Evans were driving at 120 kilometres an hour, but the speedometer read 80 kilometres an hour. He thought he must have been exhausted.

About a minute later, he saw lights in his rearview mirror – a car with six headlights. He assumed they'd pass him, but he started to doubt this as they were getting faster and closer, showing no signs of moving to pass.

He swerved into the left lane to avoid being hit but, when he looked over his shoulder to see who was driving like a maniac, no one was there. He pulled back into the right lane, turned on his hazard lights and pulled over.

What was happening, you may be thinking? To Evans, there is only one answer: aliens!

Evans got out of his car to see if he could find the lights again. He waited for what felt like hours, though only five minutes went by.

Just when he thought it was over; he saw them. The six bright lights! He knew these lights were calling him. He had to follow.

He jumped into his car again and sped down the road to follow them. He stopped when they lead down a dirt road. His car wasn't made for off-roading, but he had to follow them. He got out of his vehicle and proceeded on foot, finding himself in a clearing.

The lights had disappeared again. He knew he wasn't alone. There was something else in the field with him.

Standing in the dark meadow, he could hear the grass shifting… but there was no breeze to move it.

Light exploded out of nowhere above him. He looked up into it as an incredible wind picked up.

"You are not ready," was the last thing he heard before he woke up in his hotel bed.

Evans tried to remember what it was he saw in the light, but it was gone. He couldn't remember what he saw, but he knew it was something he'd never see again.

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Julia Rivoire

Julia enjoys mobile and PC games in her free time. She has a dog, Shadow, who means the world to her but they live in different towns while Julia attends school. Nothing memes – oh sorry I mean nothing means – more to her than memes.

If this magazine doesn’t take off I don’t know what I’ll do. I can’t go back to memeing alone. I can’t.

“OK Boomer” Accused of Violating the Memeva Conventions

Photo taken from the front lines, names have been blurred for privacy reasons

The Brokers of Older Mature Ethernet Researchers (BOOMERS) have recently put forth a public objection to the usage of the phrase, “OK Boomer”.

In their official report to the Internet Comment Section Rights Tribunal (ICSRT), BOOMERS claimed that the term violates the articles of the Memeva Conventions, citing that a use of a phrase against an entire generation targets too wide an audience and may hurt people uninvolved in the conflict.

“We reject this new weapon in the online discussion war, as it is too powerful!” came a statement from last Friday. “Some people who don’t even know how to order corn online have been hurt by this phrase. As such, we declare that it is a violation of the Memeva Conventions!”

The law in question states that the usage of blanket phrases and ad hominem attacks designed to instantly shut down comment threads are banned. This is due to their indiscriminate nature, as well as their ability to disrupt any previously existing comment chain or thread. Violations of the law can result in severe repercussions, the greatest being stern warnings from the ICSRT.

Young fighters from the Gen-Z/Millennial coalition have been quick to respond to the allegations. According to an official statement, they hold that the usage of the term “special snowflakes” from BOOMERS fighters has similarly violated the Memeva Conventions. In a live-streamed broadcast, their anonymous spokesperson stated “…we have no need to abide by rules that have already been broken. Be quiet, BOOMER.”

Fighting has broken out in comment threads across the internet, with neither side willing to give ground. The most heavily-hit areas have been an article about declining avocado sales and a Forbes report on rising housing costs. Both BOOMERS and Coalition fighters have taken to these threads and dug in hard, yet the concern of “OK Boomer” deployment is already rising.

The Horrors of War. Via reddit

”They’re not listening to our arguments anymore! We take all this time to carefully construct a set of facts and support them with evidence and all they do is say ‘OK Boomer’ and leave the thread! It’s a weapon of mass destruction, I tell you!” said one BOOMER fighter.

Dramatic photos of destroyed comment threads have already surfaced, leading many notable experts on the Memeva Conventions raising concerns about the phrase’s ubiquitous usage. Reports are already coming in describing instant destruction and subsequent abandonment of threads, affecting non-combatants including confused grandparents and apathetic millennials.

PUBLICLY released footage of weapons testing. via reddit

Some victims have testified to the ICSRT about “OK Boomer” and it’s potential repercussions. “I’ve been called a boomer four times this week alone. I’m 24, damn it!” complained an anonymous source in a private testimony. The ICSRT has declined our requests for an interview with this source.

While “Silence, Boomer” was already a weapon in some discussion threads, its unwieldy image-based nature saw it rarely used. Now, the new, clean, and text-only format of the phrase has arrived on the front lines, and we can expect more usage of “OK Boomer” in the future.

Meme Magazine will continue to watch and report as the internet witnesses its most devastating weapon of comment section warfare to this date. This article will be updated as the story develops.

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Jonathan Jeffrey

Jonathan Jeffrey is the Managing Editor of Meme Magazine. Jonathan has received several awards in the fields of meme journalism, and international fame for breaking the Scumbag Steve scandal. He has a masters degree in Advanced Meme Physchology, as well as a minor in Meme Journalism at KYM University.

"Daily Struggle" Man Sues Button Company

It was with difficulty that Mr. Struggle decided to let us use this. (Image made with imgflip)

If you are someone who can relate to the stress of making difficult decisions, then you probably recognize the “Daily Struggle” meme. In the image, a man sweats as he tries to choose between two labeled buttons to press. That man has recently come forward and reached out to us at Meme Magazine. He claims that the image is the surface of a darker truth for him.

“Mr. Struggle” (he could not decide whether to tell us his real name) spent five years working at the “Buttons-a-Plenty” corporation. The company manufactures and tests physical press-buttons of varying uses for market. Some of their products have seen great commercial success due to their novelty and use in memes. One example is the famous “Nut Button,” which itself became a meme in 2015.

During the testing phase of the buttons, they are delivered to testers in pairs. The tester then has to press each one and decide which should be packaged. When Struggle put in his resume to the company early in 2014, he applied for a position in packaging and specifically asked to be kept away from testing.

The reason? Struggle suffers from “Aboulomania,” a mental disorder which causes an individual to be pathologically indecisive. Struggle explained further in an interview with Meme Magazine:

“I asked not to be given a testing position because my disorder makes choosing very stressful for me. It may seem funny, but it’s not for the person who has it.”

Despite his request being accompanied by a medical note explaining his condition, Struggle was hired to the role of testing.

“I asked to be transferred right away,” he explained. “But they told me I need to learn to ‘press my own buttons,’ if I’m to succeed in life and work. They wouldn’t even change the testing method. They just kept sending me two and expected me to choose between them. It was too hard trying to choose another job, so I stayed and I’ve been suffering since.”

Things only got worse when a pair of photos was taken of a sweaty Struggle trying to choose between two buttons. “BE A DICK” and “DON’T BE A DICK” were labeled over the buttons, and the photos were uploaded to the internet. “Daily Struggle” has since become a choice meme of varying tones—from cute, to political to self-detrimental.

For Struggle however, the constant jokes about not being able to decide have only added salt to the wound. Tired of the torment, he left Buttons-a-Plenty last month and is now suing the company for $100,000,000 for “psychological damages and emotional distress.” He hopes that the settlement will provide a fresh start in his life with little choice and little stress.

Buttons-a-Plenty are no less confident, however. While it is yet to be seen how they will handle the lawsuit, Burton Presley, the CEO of the company shared this statement with our team:

“Mr. Struggle will soon learn that life is full of decisions you cannot hide from. A life of tough but rewarding work or a life of cowardice and shame—That is the choice he now faces.”

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/daily-struggle

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Brandi-Anne Hibbs

Brandi-Anne Hibbs has been quietly stalking and observing memes for over a decade, but still doesn’t quite understand their nature. Nevertheless, she’s dedicated to making sense of them through writing!

“I want to speak to your manager.” Karen to Karen

In an unexpected turn of events, Karen has become a manager at the grocery store.  She has become the thing she swore to destroy.

After years of horrible service, she decided to take matters into her own hands and become the boss of the operation. She used to say, “Where is your manager?” Now she says, “I am the manager.” The employees of the grocery store, such as Luca the bag boy could not believe his eyes when he found out what happened.  We asked Luca, a bag boy, what he thought of the event.

“She used to yell at me when I didn’t bag her groceries right. I always tried to apologize, but before I could get a word in, she always asked for my manager,” he said with a look of fear in his eyes. “One day it was really bad, she came back with her groceries, claiming that I broke her eggs on purpose. When in reality, she had dropped her bag in the parking lot. Before she left, she mumbled under her breath, “If I ran this place.” I laughed to myself when she said that. There was no way it could happen.”

He was wrong, so wrong. “I slapped myself silly when I found out she was becoming our manager. I don’t know what she did, but she has this kind of power that scares the living crap of my old manager. He’s taking it pretty hard. He never expected his worst nightmare to come alive.” Luca is still waiting to see if he will keep his job.  He also said that his old manager would avoid Karen at all costs.

 A change of managers is always a scary thing, but it’s even more frightening when a Karen becomes a manager. Some customers are changing grocery stores and driving on the other end of town to avoid Karen. Sources close to Meme Magazine said that Karen is planning on changing the entire set-up of the store and plans on firing half of the original staff. The news is shocking and quite frighting. Some employees who have been working at the grocery store their whole life are quitting or transferring somewhere else. What will Karen do with all her power?  Who will Karen speak to if she has complaints now? What will she do if someone named Karen asks to speak to her?  A Karen has never gotten this far; what will she do with all this power?

Stay tuned, Meme Magazine will be keeping a close eye on the situation.

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Sarah Hope

Sarah Hope has a doctorate in meme research. She also enjoys reading, writing, photography and appreciates a good pun.

Arthur's Big Hit

Have you ever seen the Arthur fist meme? Maybe you’ve seen it and not known where it came from. It was moments before Arthur hit his sister for the first and last time. In this exclusive look back to the events of the Big Hit, this article will show why Arthur had every right to hit his sister when he did.

On September 6, 1999, Arthur Timothy Read got so angry that he hit his younger sister, Dora Winifred (D.W.) Read. Following the hit, his parents, Jane and David, told him no TV for a week as punishment. His friends thought it was crazy that Arthur, their good friend, had actually hit his younger sister. Should everyone have been so surprised? No. This had been building for a while.

Arthur had been making a model plane for about a week. D.W. wanted to play with it, but Arthur told her not to. In the Read household, things between D.W. and Arthur were always tense. Once, Arthur even made a sign asking D.W. to stay out of his room – which she refused to read, entering his room anyway.

"It wasn't like I just hit her out of nowhere." Arthur said after being asked to recall the events. "It had been building for a while. D.W. never listens to me."

The photo to the right was proved by Arthur Read.

Arthur asked D.W. to leave him alone so he could build in peace. All he wanted to do was focus on his personal project. D.W. wouldn’t leave him alone.

That was strike one.

Most of the problems between Arthur and D.W. were due to D.W. not listening to Arthur’s polite requests.

When D.W. entered Arthur's room to play with the model plane, she wouldn’t listen to Arthur telling her that it wasn’t just a toy plane, but a delicate model. Arthur said he had to repaint it after he found his sister in his room holding his model when the paint wasn't dry.

That was strike two.

The third and final strike of that week was when D.W. snuck into Arthur’s room to play with his plane and broke it. She threw it out the window where it plummeted to the ground and smashed. Once Arthur saw his hard work ruined, he became very angry and rightfully so.

Arthur had never even thought about hitting his younger sister before. No matter how angry she made him. The hit was so strong he knocked her to the ground. There was a moment's pause from D.W. once her bottom hit the ground. It took Arthur a moment to realize what had happened. He couldn’t believe he had done it himself. D.W. may be his younger sister but she had it coming for a while.

Arthur hasn’t hit anyone since the hitting incident of 1999. After so long of being ignored by D.W. and losing countless toys to her ignorance, Arthur did what only a child who was as angry as he was in that moment to do. Sometimes when you can’t express yourself with words all you can do is speak with your actions.

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Julia Rivoire

Julia enjoys mobile and PC games in her free time. She has a dog, Shadow, who means the world to her but they live in different towns while Julia attends school. Nothing memes oh sorry I mean nothing means more to her then memes.

If this magazine doesn’t take off I don’t know what I’ll do. I can’t go back to memeing alone. I can’t.

On the Edge of Madness: Miss Piggy's Psychotic Breakdown

During their decades on The Muppets being on air, there was always speculation over the status of stars Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy’s relationship. Their unconventional and destructive relationship between a domineering pig and yielding frog left the audience reeling for more of their quirky exchange.

Outside the show’s premise however, the ambiguity has remained between the two stars of The Muppets. In contrast, Kermit denies there’s any intimacy between his co-star as it is strictly professional rapport. Miss Piggy, on the other hand, isn’t reserved and content to disclose personal information about their supposed romance.

In recent news, the true nature of the alleged liaison between our notorious duo has been revealed after decades of suspicion. However, this revelation has to do with one certain pig that shouldn’t be messed with when it comes to her spotlight.

This occurred when a new face has emerged on The Muppets; a svelte and fresh-looking pig named Denise, who is now in turn a rival in the eyes of the rumbustious and long-standing veteran Miss Piggy. Especially, when headlines are bombarded with Kermit seemingly enamoured with the young sow guile charm, and even during interviews makes no qualms against denying the rumours circling about a possible romance flourishing.

There have been rumours about how Denise will be replacing Miss Piggy as our rowdy hog has overstayed her welcome.

If only the studio had the hindsight to realize what grave error they were making pushing this pig out of show biz. Miss Piggy certainly wasn’t going to back down quietly, especially with this young pig stealing her hard-earned spotlight and her beloved frog.

On one Monday afternoon, the newly sensational power couple of Denise and Kermit were exiting out one of their favourite cafés. They had found a deranged Miss Piggy with mascara smeared against her bulging eyes, setting their car ablaze right in front of them. The two stood frozen on the spot from start to finish as the crazy pig lit the rags from an expensive wine bottle and threw it against their green, $25,800 Mini Cooper.

She then proceeded to throw herself and viciously tear out Denise’s extensions, as Kermit fainted at the sight of flesh exuding out of the fake hair from the force of her grip. It wasn’t over until the authorities showed up, had her forcefully removed and heavily sedated her on several tranquilizers that could put down a 2.4 meter tall polar bear.

Miss Piggy was still screaming and squirming even under heavy sedation, as many of the authorities came out with broken ribs and noses because Miss Piggy is highly skilled in martial arts.

https://me.me/i/kermit-the-frog-denies-being-in-a-relationship-with-denise-12280325

She was then admitted to an asylum catering to Muppets – especially ones falling into hard drugs and sex addiction involving autoerotic asphyxiation – where they can no longer sing and dance for the man. This occurred after they raided her mansion, finding a secret passage where there were several voyeuristic pictures of Kermit. Some of his items were taken from set and laid in a little shrine dedicated to him, and there were many drawings depicting Denise being brutally murdered in different, and quite clever ways.

Sources say that, after Miss Piggy underwent several psychiatric evaluations, it was determined that their relationship was merely a delusion in her mind which is now “disturbingly clear.” She will be heavily sedated and spend the remainder of her days in the asylum.

That is, if they can keep her locked up.

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Chris Joyal

A nineteen year old unhealthily obsessed with Hannibal memes and anything darkly humorous. Or any stupid pun that my little brain capacity can comprehend. Often called a cave-dweller or ghost by known relatives, and probably a few classmates as well, because of my rare sightings and frequent disappearances, like Big Foot, or the Loch Ness Monster.

BREAKING: Jeb! Bush Wins 2016 American Election Due to Previously Unnoticed Error

Bush Stands excitedly in front of a white cutout of the new 2016 election map, now correctly proclaiming him as the winner.

Jeb Bush is now the president of the United States of America. In a surprise turnabout, the Federal Election Commission (FEC) of America has announced that all votes cast during the 2016 General Election, bar a select few, have been disqualified. In a public statement made last Thursday, they cited reasons including “wrong ballot sizes” and “marks outside of requisite bubble” as conditions for ballot removal. The only correct votes were ones for Republican nominee Bush, and as such he has automatically become the US President.

Bush had dropped out of the presidential race during the primaries, leaving the race for Republican Party leadership to others, including the erstwhile president Donald Trump. Winning every seat in a landslide vote, the American House of Commons is now entirely controlled by Bush, displacing the previously Republican and Democrat owned seats. Meme Magazine reached out to Bush for comment.

“The prophesy foretold of this day!” he explained.

“I will rule America with an iron fist, and everyone will be sure to clap before, during, and after I ask for it! No one will ever dare challenge the might of the Bush dynasty ever again!” the rest of the interview has been omitted due to his continual maniacal laughter and refusal to answer our questions.

Meme Magazine also contacted the printing company in charge of creating and distributing the ballots.

"Well, when (the FEC) said that they needed A4 size paper cut into thirds, they never specified how they wanted it to be cut. I didn’t want to ask and look dumb in front of the election people so we flipped a coin and decided to cut it lengthwise. I guess we weren’t supposed to do that. Oops.”

The Future?

The FEC has urged other voting authorities worldwide to review recent elections in case a similar error has been made. An anonymous source from UK Electoral Commission has reached out to Meme Magazine saying that the possibility of a Bush win in their recent vote is likely.

Bush has already begun to assemble his presidential cabinet,.

“Only the strongest of bushes will rule with me!” announced Bush.

As of reporting, Bush has appointed a local hedge maze as his minister of defense, citing its “Impenetrable walls and inescapable structure”. Rumours have said that a local shrubbery will be the next Minister of Foreign Affairs, but this has been largely dismissed due to it’s British/American citizenship status.

Bush has now made American history as not only first candidate to win every vote, but also as the first write-in candidate to win an American election. The FEC has not made any other statements regarding the situation, but Meme Magazine will be watching intently as the situation unfolds.

As we watch Elections Canada retally their votes, all we can do now is hope. We must hope for America, hope for the United Kingdom and hope that we too, are not next.

Editor’s note: While Meme Magazine is primarily a lifestyle magazine and generally stays away from politics, we deemed this an important event to cover here. While Bush’s meme status has been of some debate, we felt that his involvement in the meme industry meant that this needed to be covered.

---

Jonathan Jeffrey

Jonathan Jeffrey is the Managing Editor of Meme Magazine. Jonathan has received several awards in the fields of meme journalism, and international fame for breaking the Scumbag Steve scandal. He has a masters degree in Advanced Meme Psychology, as well as a minor in Meme Journalism at KYM University.

Futurama’s Fry “Not sure of anything anymore” after meme-breakdown

I’m pretty sure he’s not sure.

Does a man become a meme, or does the meme become the man? That’s what Futurama’s Philip J. Fry is now finding out.

The animated star has been hospitalized after he reportedly had a nervous breakdown in his New New York home earlier this month. We spoke with his wife, Turanga Leela, who was with him when it happened.

“We were sitting on the sofa browsing the web when we scrolled upon some “Not Sure” memes,” she recalled. “I noticed Fry was kind of quiet, so I looked over at him and he was just staring into his can of Slurm. There was sweat dripping down his face. I asked if he was OK, and suddenly he just flung the can on the floor, stood up and yelled ‘NOT SURE!’ and just lost it.”

Leela promptly called the police when Fry began running around frantically, flailing his arms and screaming out the various memes they had read.

Despite the many versions of the “Not sure” text, Fry doesn’t speak in the actual scene depicted above.

The “Not Sure” meme was created in 2011. It features a still from Futurama of Fry squinting suspiciously with overlaid text that expresses unsureness about a random topic. Examples include:

“NOT SURE IF REAL LIFE OR JUST FANTASY!”

“NOT SURE IF FART OR DIARRHEA!”

“NOT SURE IF DÉJÀ VU OR PSYCHIC!”

Fry was yelling similar phrases when the police arrived and apprehended him. He was immediately hospitalized and will remain so until further notice. According to Fry’s doctor, Dr. John A. Zoidberg, his condition has since stabilized, although he is showing signs of lethargy and depression. When asked questions, his only response was, “Not sure of anything anymore.”

What brought this beloved cartoon star to such a dismal state? While it is not sure what caused the episode, Zoidberg suspects that the overuse of the meme on the internet is to blame.

“It is possible that Mr. Fry became overwhelmed by the amount of exposure and mockery ‘Not Sure’ brought forth,” Zoidberg explained.

This would not be the first time a meme has affected Fry negatively. Back in 2010, an image of him from Futurama was circulated, which showed him holding a wad of cash and exclaiming, “Shut up and take my money!” Since then, the meme has seen continuous use as an expression of excitement toward making purchases. According to his best friend Bender Bending Rodriguez, the image turned Fry into a compulsive shopper.

“Seeing his face associated with all those purchases must’ve made him snap,” said Rodriguez. “Now, whenever he sees one, he throws his money around like a lunatic. Not that I care, though. He’ll buy me anything now! It’s great!”

Dr. Zoidberg has likened Fry’s issues to a bizarre case of looking-glass self – an instance of an individual seeing how society perceives them and adopting that same perception of themselves.

“He sees his face all over the media. He sees how the world depicts him and he finds himself needing to fulfill that role,” Zoidberg explained. “In this case, his impulse to embody the meme has caused him to have an existential crisis. He has lost his sense of meaning. He truly is ‘not sure’ of himself.”

Where does Philip Fry go from here? How will he cope in a world that shares and consumes images so rapidly? Fortunately, he has friends and family to support him through the journey.

“One thing’s for sure, he’s not going to be allowed on the internet for a while,” Leela declared. “He’s going to have to learn to see himself through his own two eyes, and that means no more browsing for us. It’ll be hard, but we’ll get through it together.”

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/futurama-fry-not-sure-if

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Brandi-Anne Hibbs

Brandi-Anne Hibbs has been quietly stalking and observing memes for over a decade, but still doesn’t quite understand their nature. Nevertheless, she’s dedicated to making sense of them through writing!

Meme Magazine Remembers Grumpy Cat

With heavy hearts, we here at Meme Magazine report the death of Grumpy Cat, a force of nature that stirred up the meme world when we needed it the most. She will forever be remembered as a trailblazer in the industry, as such, all of us here at Meme Magazine would like to give our most profound condolences towards the Cat family. Moreover, we would like to take a moment to remember the meme communities’ most cherished moments with Ms. Cat.

Photo taken during his the launch of his “Backhanded” product line release party. (JStone/Shutterstock)

Ms. Cat rose to stardom in the meme world in 2012 with his famous campaign of pessimistic image macros, and is crediting with starting the counterculture movement against motivational posters. Her eight-year journey through the meme world was one that everyone in the Cat family could be proud of.

Ms. Cat grew up in a musical household, and her older brothers Bongo and Keyboard Cat quickly stole the spotlight amongst the local meme connoisseurs.

“My father, Nyan, really got all of us into music. I never was much good at it, so I decided to hit it big in another field.” Said Ms. Cat in a 2013 interview with Meme Magazine. She spoke at length about the admiration for her father, the musical genius known as Nyan Cat, who put the Cat family on the map in the meme world.

“My manager is the best.” Continued Ms. Cat. “No matter how anxious I get, he’s always there to push me and my talents in the right direction.” Ms. Cat’s manager, Ridiculously Photogenic Guy, has been credited as the one to help cultivate Ms. Cat’s unique sense of image and style..

“(Ridiculously) is no stranger to image macros and meme culture. He’s been a great help.” Grumpy Cat concluded in that interview.

Other stars in the Meme community have reached out with their condolences.

“I just… I don’t know how to react.” Was the response from Keanu Reeves.

“He helped me get past so much. I can’t believe he’s gone.” Continued Mr. Reeves. Mr. Reeves famously suffered from depression as “Sad Keanu’. He credited the support and friendship from Ms. Cat as a critical source for his recovery.

Her brothers, Bongo and Keyboard Cat have suspended their current world tour, but have yet to release a statement. According to their agent however, they may be flying back to their estate in Malibu to attend the funeral. The Cat estate has made it known that they wish to hold private funeral for Mr. Cat, but a public memorial will be held this Sunday outside of Los Angeles city hall. We can confirm that meme superstars Bad Luck Brian and Good Guy Greg will be attending the ceremony for the beloved Ms. Cat.

Ms. Cat’s death has affected us all here at Meme Magazine, and once again, we offer our deepest sympathies. Ms. Cat was indeed an icon in the meme world, and her shooting star of fame will forever be remembered by all of us.

You can tweet your sympathies to the Cat family here, at the official Grumpy Cat twitter page: https://twitter.com/RealGrumpyCat?s=17

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Jonathan Jeffrey

Jonathan Jeffrey is the Managing Editor of Meme Magazine. Jonathan has received several awards in the fields of meme journalism, and garnered international fame for breaking the Scumbag Steve scandal. He has a masters degree in Advanced Meme Psychology, as well as a minor in Meme Journalism at KYM University.

Internet Sensation Gone Missing

 Where is Spongebob Squarepants?

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/ight-imma-head-out

Mr. Squarepants was last seen in his living room watching television, seemingly fine and enjoying a regular day with his snail, Gary. According to our anonymous sources, his last words were “Imma head out,” but where did he “head out” to? When asked, his pet Gary only responded with a sad meow.

The search continued at the house of his neighbour Squidward Tentacles. He opened the door with his clarinet in hand and did not look amused. “It’s a lot quieter.” He responded with a dull voice, he then slammed the door and went back to playing the clarinet. After finding no information from Mr. Tentacles, we went to his other neighbor Patrick Star who was no help. He did not have a clue where his best friend was. After finding no information on him from his neighbours, The Krusty Krab was the next option. Mr. Krabs was no help either.

“If he does not show up tomorrow, he’s FIRED!” Mr. Krabs yelled. He made it evident that he does not genuinely care about Mr. Squarepants. Mr. Krabs then asked us to buy a Krabby Paddy or leave.

Before he went missing, Mr. Squarepants appeared to be doing well, but the world had seen some unusual behaviour from him in the last couple of years. According to reports, he was seen in his caveman form exploring the outside world, and he fled when we tried to approach him. Usually, Mr. Squarepants is comical, happy and kind, but on May 5th, 2017 he was seen mocking his friends and boss at the Krusty Krab. Afterwards, he was spotted running around a jelly fish forest wholly naked then later seen trying to catch his breath. His behaviour seems unusual and quite concerning. He does not seem to be the same loving, happy-go-lucky sponge that we know and love.

What has become of him? Has the fame gone to his head? Around June 2nd, it appeared Mr. Squarepants was making a recovery. He was seen once again travelling the world wearing drag and appeared to be doing better. The world could relax for a little bit, knowing that Mr. Squarepants was improving. However, our worst fear has come to light: SpongeBob Squarepants disappeared. Mr. Squarepants headed out, but we do not have a single clue where he went. There are no traces; no activity on his accounts, there is nothing, absolutely nothing. This news is devastating. We hope that Mr. Squarepants will find his way back soon. While he “headed out”, we need him to “head in.” If not the internet world will never be the same.

https://www.complex.com/pop-culture/2019/09/best-spongebob-memes

Sarah Hope

Sarah Hope has a doctorate in meme research. She also enjoys reading, writing, photography and appreciates a good pun.

Shaggy Rogers Tells All: His Impossible Power Explained in Exclusive Interview

A rare image of shaggy using his power. (still only at 1%)

After spending countless hours searching for the answers, Meme Magazine readers will finally get the answers as to why Shaggy Rogers has such incredible powers. From where he got his powers from to why they came to light so suddenly. I answer all these questions in this exclusive interview with Shaggy (He’s Only Using One Percent of His Power) Rogers.

I kicked off the interview with the big hitter: asking him were he got his power.

"My powers, like, man, it was the weirdest trip ever to New Mexico. Scoob and I ran back to the town after meeting the ‘aliens’. We made it the diner and just wanted to eat." Mister Rogers holds a hand to his stomach while he speaks. After getting him some burgers, he continues his story. "Scoob and I found ourselves in that diner. Diners have some of the best burgers, man. We ordered and like, man, I had a weird feeling about the place. And that was before we saw the spaceship."

I asked him if that was the start of his power. "My power, man, I've always had power. Not the one you know that I got on this trip." Mister Rogers was reluctant to discuss ‘The Alien Invaders,' "Like you really want to know, don't you?" Mister Rogers bargained for more food and continued talking. "It was a weird time for Scoob and me. We weren't like looking for anyone but, man, when we found them. What were we to do?"

"No, we had no idea that they (Crystal and her dog Amber) were aliens. It was so rad to finally see some rad people, and of course, they turn out to be aliens." Mister Rogers’ eyes glazed over as he thought about the events of that night, possibly reliving them. He didn't want to go into details when asked what happened on the spaceship.

Once his appetite was satisfied, he gave me more detail. "Man, like, some crazy stuff went down on that ship. Stuff, nobody, should experience, man. I don't remember all of it, but I do remember that she (Crystal) told me I was ‘The One.' My power had to be released to do something. I had no idea what she was talking about, but she was serious, and then I passed out again." Mister Rogers took a moment to collect himself.

"After I woke up, I found Scooby and the gang looking for me. Fred and Daphne were terrified. Velma wouldn't look at me. I couldn't understand why man.”

I curiously asked him how he knew what happened. “It was Scooby that told me what happened. I destroyed the town (Roswell), man, there was nothing left."

I asked him about the Roswell that was still there in New Mexico. He seemed confused by the question and didn’t answer.

After prompting him for more details on the destruction of the town he said, “I couldn’t let myself do that again. I had to contain it; Velma helped me by coming up with this ‘special blend’ to help me control my power. We were safe. I thought we wouldn't have to deal with it again. We changed how the mystery was solved, we covered it up, but that didn't keep it quiet for long, man. Because later, it came back out not as strong, but it was there. I only use one percent for everyone else, not for me."

Mister Rogers left after that. Scooby Doo wouldn’t allow anymore questions of his dear friend Shaggy. We tried to get statements from the rest of the gang but all but Fred Jones, the groups leader, said was: “It was terrible time for the gang and we don’t want to go into more detail. Thank you.” They then drove away in the Mystery Machine. Do these revelations change your view of the icon? Tell us below in the comments.

Where the image came from: https://mashable.com/article/shaggy-scooby-doo-ultra-instinct-memes/

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Julia Rivoire

Julia enjoys mobile and PC games in her free time. She has a dog, Shadow, who means the world to her but they live in different towns while Julia attends school. Nothing memes oh sorry I mean nothing means more to her then memes.

If this magazine doesn’t take off I don’t know what I’ll do. I can’t go back to memeing alone. I can’t.

Behind the Red Curtain

Behind the Red Curtain: Elmo’s Descent to Infamy

Elmo, Sesame Street’s beloved little red monster, has left audiences star-struck for the past few decades with his child-like wonder and insatiable curiosity. He could make friends with just about everyone, such as the foul-smelling and rambunctious Oscar the Grouch, a green goon who literally lives in a garbage can.

This adorable three and a half-year-old, ageless in these last decades, has an innate goodness that bewitched everyone around him. Despite being adored by all his fans and his Sesame Street Gang, there comes a pressure when your public persona takes over your life, and is seems the only way out is to go a little crazy.

Behind the set, when the cameras weren't rolling, this little ball of joy became an unrecognizable animal towards his castmates and terrified the children, who came and went frequently on the show because they couldn’t handle him. One castmate in particular encountered this abuse. Elmo’s orange-haired female counterpart, Zoe. Elmo made derogatory remarks on account of her ballerina outfit, and how she should go on without it, like when they first aired on the show.  At one point during the shooting, he bit her ear and wouldn’t let go.  Zoe had to get stitches to keep the fluff from falling out.

What was the reason behind his radical behaviour?

As it turns out, Elmo had been found snorting a mountain of white that belonged to Cookie Monster’s “special” cookie recipe, which altered Elmo’s appearance to a bone-thin, raggedy man with wild hair: crazy and on drugs in a matter of weeks. That’s when Sesame Street decided to kick Elmo to the curb, where he lived behind Oscar the Grouch dumpster’s bins; turning tricks and mugging people for money to get the same high Cookie Monster’s batch gave him.

 It wasn’t until one day when he was swatting imaginary bees and knocking over garbage cans, including the Grouch, who was last seen rolling down into traffic, whether he survived or not has yet to be confirmed. The only witnesses at the scene of this atrocity were none other than this infamous band of smooth-talking and drug-taking rockers called Electric Mayhem.

At that moment they realized this was their drummer, because no one could match the wild intensity he possessed banging those cans. They laid out cookie crumbs for him to sniff out to their van, where they snatched him and kept him shackled in a cold basement; feeding him only cookies and giving him the name Animal. 

Oddly enough, the group became inseparable and caused mayhem whatever gig thrown at them and to squander it to pieces whenever they’re up on stage at some dismal club. Mostly, due to Animal's erratic behaviour of being constantly drugged out of his mind on Cookie Monster's special flour. From biting the fluff out of puppets, and groping any woman he could get his bony hands on. Or taking out big chunks out of his drums with his gnarled teeth, which is slowly being broken down to the gum line due to his heavy abuse.

However, whenever Electric Mayhem does get a chance to play, when they’re not pursuing their usual self-destructive habits, they can play a slick tune of rock n’ roll with Animal’s killer drums roaring in the background.

https://me.me/i/before-2b396b8496d94f2884feaeb99be9e192

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Chris Joyal

A nineteen year old unhealthily obsessed with Hannibal memes and anything darkly humorous. Or any stupid pun that my little brain capacity can comprehend. Often called a cave-dweller or ghost by known relatives, and probably a few classmates as well, because of my rare sightings and frequent disappearances, like Big Foot, or the Loch Ness Monster.

Works at Meme Magazine.

Distracted Boyfriend - His (Back)side of the Story

It was a fair day in 2015 when a dashing young man was taking a walk with his girlfriend downtown. Their sweet stroll turned sour when they passed a young lady, whose bottom caught the eye of the man, prompting him to stare back at it. His girlfriend noticed this and was less than amused, flashing him a look of disgust. Unfortunately for the man, the moment was caught on camera and shared online, sparking a meme the internet has had its way with for years.

“Distracted Boyfriend,” as he is now known, has received much flack since. His inability to avert his gaze has been compared to scenarios such as being preoccupied with choosing a film while your dinner gets cold or browsing new books while your unread books sit on the shelf. Now, four years later, Mr. Boyfriend is tired of being the butt of the joke, and is ready to tell his shocking side of the story in an exclusive interview with Meme Magazine.

It’s so accurate, you can’t help but stare.

MM: You say the “Distracted Boyfriend” meme is a total misunderstanding. Then what was it that made you stare at that woman’s derrière?

DB: It was a trap. My girlfriend was all like, “She has a nice ass, doesn’t she?” and like, what would you expect me to do? I looked!

MM: So, you’re saying your girlfriend baited you into looking at the woman?

DB: Yeah. So I looked, and then she gets all upset with me and is like, “I can’t believe you!” And to top it all off, this photographer just happens to be there to capture the whole thing! She set me up, and now the world thinks I’m some cheater! But I’m the victim here! I’m the one who’s been hurt the most by this!

MM: How so?

DB: So get this. A week after she flips at me, I come home from work and find her on the couch kissin’ up that same girl!

MM: Your girlfriend was with the other woman in the photograph?

DB: Yeah! She was cheating on me! And yet I’m the one getting all the shit from everyone! It’s not right!

MM: Why did your girlfriend want to set you up?

DB: Well, this isn’t the first time she’s cheated. We live at the house her dad bought for her - she’s from a pretty rich family, and she thinks because it’s her place, she can bring back any guy or girl she wants, even though we never agreed to that. I work hard. I spend most of my money on her. I try to make her happy, but she just uses me. I got sick of it, so I threatened to out her as a cheater to all her friends if she didn’t stop, and uh, I guess she beat me to that.

MM: What is the state of your relationship now that the fire has cooled?

DB: Her and I are long over, but I wanted to finally clear my name. Also, hey ladies! I’m single, and willing to stare at your ass all you want! My Snapchat user is “NotDistractedIPromise.”

Do you believe Distracted Boyfriend’s testimony? Let us know in the comments!

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/distracted-boyfriend

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Brandi-Anne Hibbs

Brandi-Anne Hibbs has been quietly stalking and observing memes for over a decade, but still doesn’t quite understand their nature. Nevertheless, she’s dedicated to making sense of them through writing!