How to cope with homesickness
/Some days, the longing for home sinks in like a winter chill. Other days, it can hit you like a freight train. No matter how it settles in though, homesickness can lead you down a path to heartbreak.
Homesickness doesn’t discriminate. It’s something that any of us that who have snuck away from home can fall ill to. Some feel it for the first time when they jet off to college or university, while others carry it with them after they’ve relocated to a different county. Knowing what we do about nostalgia, it’s easy to see how homesickness and nostalgia can go hand in hand.
Nostalgia makes us long for the past. It can make us miss particular times in our life, people we no longer see, and places we’ve previously been — including home! Maybe you’re missing your mom’s home cooked meals, or yearning to drive to your favourite lookout in town. Maybe you feel disconnected from your culture and long to have a conversation in your native tongue.
No matter the journey you’ve taken that led you to feel homesick, here are some tips and tricks that can help soothe your ache for home.
Let yourself feel it
Embrace it! As with any emotion, hiding from homesickness may prove to be futile. It’s okay to be sad, and it’s okay to miss something that you can’t physically hold in your hands. This feeling may be all consuming at times, but it certainly does not make you weak.
Let yourself reminisce about your favourite things back home. While I wouldn’t recommend wallowing all day, a good cry can be therapeutic. Take some time for yourself. Whether you believe it or not, you know what’s best for you.
Distract yourself
On the flip side to embracing your emotions, I also recommend giving yourself some sort of distraction. Isolating yourself tends to intensify negative emotions, so putting yourself out there in the world can be very soothing. Get yourself out of the house by taking a walk, running errands, or calling up a friend to go grab a coffee.
Immerse yourself in the place you are now instead of trying to climb back to the place you were.
Call a friend
Or your mom, or your grandpa, or your cousin — whoever’s voice it is that you need to hear to soothe that ache you feel in your chest. My favourite thing to do when I’m missing home is to call up my mom and listen to her chatter about the mundane comings and goings of her life. She’s my one-stop-shop to get all the updates I need from my hometown.
Expressing your feelings to someone you trust can be extremely therapeutic. Even if they can’t understand your exact situation, an empathetic ear goes a long way.
Bring home to you
Though we live in a digital age, my love for physical copies of photos and photo albums is as strong as ever. When I’m feeling nostalgic, I find myself being pulled towards my photo albums, travelling through them like a visual time machine. I surround myself with picture frames of friends and family — people that I can’t see every day. It makes me feel less alone and keeps them present in my life, even when they can’t be here.
If you’re yearning for your home country, consider visiting a local shop that carries grocery and lifestyle items specifically from your country. There’s Dutch Groceries and Giftware, and The Scottish and Irish Store, among others that are here in the Ottawa area for those that are far from home!
Plan something to look forward to
It doesn’t have to be anything big or extravagant, it can be as simple as picking up a coffee and donut from your favourite coffee shop. Try and sneak simple joys into your day.
Scheduling a video chat with a friend or family member back home is my go-to whenever I need a pick-me-up. With busy schedules, it’s nice to plan ahead and carve out time for a dose of home and companionship that we might otherwise miss out on.
Don’t compare yourself to others
It’s nice to hear this every now and again: everyone copes with things differently — including homesickness. That, and you never know what others are going through. It’s all too easy to look at other people that have been through similar situations and compare them to your own hardships. That said, it’s easy to look like you have your shiitake together.
“Maybe you had to leave in order to really miss a place; maybe you had to travel to figure out how beloved your starting point was.”
If I leave you with one thing, let it be this: it’s nice to have something to miss. As painful as it can be to be far away from the people and place we love, having something we cherish enough to be homesick over is a beautiful thing.
Peyton Scott
Peyton is a full-time student, part-time writer, and partial night owl. She falls in love with everything at least once, but especially (and in no particular order): words, furry creatures, empty notebooks, true crime, hikes (and probably you).
Instagram: @peyyscott
Twitter: @peyytonscott
